The answer to all of our problems is math.
That’s one way to get it.
Or parking rage that is.
Ever witness another driver who has completely disrespected the concept of parking spaces? Now there’s a way to let this person know how you really feel!
In the caveman days (i.e. up until now) drivers with words to say about your parking would have to resort to scribbling a profane message on the back of a crumpled receipt to leave on your windshield. Or if you’re me you don’t get a note but rather you get your windshield wiper ripped off in rage… because I maybe one time parked too close to another car but was seriously just running into Macy’s for 2 minutes and it was the only open space I could find and I thought I’d be back before the other driver returned. (I learned my lesson.)
Anyways, now there’s a program that lets you text people who suck at parking by using their license plate #. It’s call CurbTxt, and it’s only in San Francisco right now, but other cities might see the potential and soon it could remedy the problem of bad parking jobs everywhere!
The problem is that it’s opt-in only (kind of has to be…) so if people don’t know about it and sign up, you won’t be able to tell them what a shitty attempt at parallel parking that was.
Ignore what I said yesterday about wanting to be a commuter in Russia.
Thinking about moving to Russia after hearing that people are commuting via a trampoline path. So rad.
As excited as I am about my new MINI cobe, it’s not easy to say goodbye to the original Cobe Car, the car I grew up with, my Mazda Protege. Time to get emotional.
That car got me to 1st period on time (almost) every day in high school. That car earned me my first (and so far, my only…) speeding ticket. Led me to concert venues to see bands I’m too embarrassed to mention now. Gave me a space for heart-to-hearts, petty arguments, and existential conversations that were entirely beyond my level of maturity. Set the scene for first kisses, goodbye kisses, awkward dates, and miserable breakups. That car took me on unforgettable road trips that fostered inside jokes and amplified uncontrollable laughter. It was my rehearsal stage for big presentations and speeches, my hideaway during emotional breakdowns, and my dining room in-transit for meals on the go.
It transformed into an imaginary karaoke bar for bad singalongs, and stood by as my schizophrenic musical tastes evolved through Top 40, Emo, Alt Rock, Pop Country, Indie Rock, Classic Rock, Motown, Folk Rock, and back to Indie Rock again. That car fought to keep the tradition of mixed tapes alive, with a glove compartment full of homemade, sharpie-decorated CDs that eventually lost their place to the iPod connector I shoved in the cigarette lighter.
That car traveled to college with me, reminded me of home when I was homesick, and stood it’s ground during football season to host tailgates in between SUVs and pick-up trucks. It kept me safe in my first car accident. Endured undeserved foul language when my keys were “accidentally” locked inside in the middle of nowhere on a camping trip, kept me warm when I got stuck in a ditch during a blizzard, and forgave me each and every time I hit a curb and got a flat tire.
It held crammed boxes and oddly shaped breakables intact when I moved my life to Raleigh. Inspired me to start I Love Commuting. And put up with all of my whining and complaining when in reality I had nothing to whine about. Even despite my maintenance neglect, she always got me where I needed to go. We got lost together and we found our way together. And for that, the Cobe Car can never truly be replaced.
MINI Cobe certainly has big shoes to fill.
When I brought MINI Cobe home, my parents resumed ownership of the Mazda, in hopes that they could get a few hundred bucks for it from CarMax. But first I had to clean it out.
When it comes to my car, I generally try to avoid using the backseat as a closet. I kept it fairly neat and free of debris. So imagine my surprise when after all is said and done, I walk away with this collection of treasures:
-Two keepsake graduation tassels: (1) LCB Skyhawk Blue, (1) JMU Purple & Gold
-One plastic hair clip
-One toothpick, in plastic wrap
-One bobby pin
-Three clear glass vase filler beads
-One orange paper clip
-Two strips of velcro remnants from an EZPass
-One metallic green origami crane, made by yours truly from a Stride gum wrapper
-One mechanical pencil, no lead
-One plastic keychain with Richmond cab numbers
-One purple JMU ballpoint pen
-One-hundred and twenty-seven pennies
-Two plastic water bottles
-One bungee cord
-One Sheetz coupon for a free MTO item (!!!!!!)
-One brown pea coat
-One Abercrombie & Fitch Shopping Bag (shirtless male model edition)
-One, never opened, Auto Emergency Kit
-One navy blue travel umbrella
-Three maps: (1) Washington D.C. circa 1998, (1) Downtown Richmond, (1) Southeastern States
When I first set out to find a new car, I did not imagine that I would be writing a down payment check 8 days later. I fully planned to take my time, consider all of my options, go for multiple test drives, read reviews, do the math to anticipate financing scenarios, and everything else that goes into making a completely rational decision.
That clearly didn’t happen the way I thought it would.
On the eighth day of my car shopping mission, I visited Crown MINI of Richmond. I had no real intention of buying a MINI because I thought it would be too expensive, but I figured why not take a test drive just for fun?
When I walked through the lot scanning the inventory, I tried my best to look only moderately interested, playing hard to get if you will. What happened next was essentially love at first sight, followed by an irrational impulse to leave together immediately. I spotted a 2012 Hot Chocolate Cooper Hardtop, no racing stripes, black roof, minimal as far as design goes, but it was the manifestation of everything I wanted in a car. Different, but not obnoxious. Premium, but not extravagant. Small, but not impractical. And to my pleasant surprise, affordable, but certainly not cheap.
I handed over my info for a credit check, and less than 12 hours later MINI cobe and I were driving back to Raleigh.
On the Eighth day of car shopping, the car gods gave to me:
Eight (ish) seconds to accelerate
Seven inch center speed-o
Six air bags for safety
FIVE. HOURS. OF. Paperwoooooork
Three cup holders
Two doors with a hatchback
and one MINI with great fuel economyyyyyyy!